you're such a saint
by quinnslopez
Summary: Lost in a world of frustration and fear, Quinn was convinced love does not exist. But what happens when she meets a mysterious brunette? Quinntana. AU-ish.
1. the day I met you

_This's for the Quinntana week 2014 and I decided to give it a shot. I will continue this story for sure, cause leaving you like this would be like, unfinished business. Anyways, this is not Rated M and I'm not sure if it will be (but y'know anything could happen). This is pretty much AU-ish and set in New York and Lima. Enjoy!_

The first time Santana's world turned upside down, was when she just hit her sweet 16. Frankly, four days after her celebration, her parents announced they were getting a divorce and Maribel planned moving to Lima, Ohio with her daughter whether she liked it or not.

Staying at her dad's was out of question, since he worked days and nights and was hardly ever home, probably also leading to the split between her parents, however part of her wished she could stay back in New York with her father.

She was a sophomore at high school and has just been appointed to head-cheerleader by their coach, not only she was popular and had loads of friends at hand, ready to do whatever she ordered, also she was going "strong" with her current boyfriend Simon Nelson. Sure, he wasn't the biggest fish in the ocean and she just didn't find herself attracted to him, but he respected her boundaries and did good work for her reputation.

The feisty Latina worried about her friends, since she knew most of them would turn their back on her, once she left New York far behind.

Also, even if they did try to communicate with her, Santana wasn't quite sure if there was free wi-fi access in this small cow-town or if they even knew how to use technology.

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Shortly before the Lopez family (excluding her dad) packed their stuff and left their dear old home, New York, in a rush (well not exactly, considering the traffic in New York City), the latina insisted on stopping by at Simon's during the ride.

She called him up earlier and told him to wait on his porch for her.

As Maribel slowed down the car next to the curb, the younger girl leaped out off the car, tagging towards the already waiting adolescent.

„Babe…" he took a step forward, trying to pull her into his arms. Santana slightly stretched her arm out, shoving him softly, yet firmly away from her body.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her mother impatiently tapping her finger against the steering wheel.  
„Look we need to talk. The long distance thing… It won't work. I need a warm boy underneath me, and clearly we both agree this relationship was only for social use."

The words sounded harsher than intended, especially since Santana didn't have time to pull a melodramatic break-up number. She wasn't even sure if he even had feelings for her or only used her like she did. The latter was more likely.

His shoulder sagged slightly.  
„Yeah, I know, but I will still miss you" Lies. Why did boys always feel the urge to sugar-coat everything?

Santana finally allowed him to pull her in for a quick hug, before she hurriedly skipped back to the car, shouting „I'll text you" as she slammed the car-door shut.

"Are you ok?" Maribel asked, her hand lingering on the engine.  
Santana glanced towards her mother, her lips pursed in a tight line.

"Do I look okay? I'm leaving fucking New York City for cow-town Lima"

Maribel chuckled at her daughter's determination.

"You'll like it, believe me"

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Yes, it turned out Lima actually had access to wifi and no, not all oft hem were farmers.

People were generally friendly, yet more closeted minded and more stupid than for their own good.

On the first day of school, the girl was striding through the hallway alone, curious gazes lingering on her.

Santana was used the attention and kept her chin up further than usual, her hips swaying and her eyes facing the prying glances with confidence.

The girl already knew she'd make it big in this school.

Alone the first day three guys asked for her number.

Even thought many boys begged for Santana's affection, never as many asked her out the same day. Which was perhaps down to the fact, that she didn't uphold a reputation as the ice-queen yet and people actually dared talking to her.

Whilst lunch-break, she ended up in the cafeteria, poking mushy meat with her fork, until she finally pushed it away from herself, deciding she would skip lunch today. Or maybe she would just keep it for the next three years altogether.

She was not sure if she should try out for Cheerios this year, since the Coach seemed incredible strict, forcing the girls to diet off nearly nothing 24/7. And Santana loved her food way too much to put up with this crap.

She was so caught up in her thoughts, she didn't even notice a tender person sitting down on the seat next to her.

Expecting one of those freaks from earlier, she prepared a serious of insults, before she turned around.

The girl she faced took her breath away, immediately having forgotten the list of insults.

"Is it ok for me to sit next to you?" the girl asked, obviously having noticed the latina's expression.

Santana's heart pounded faster and her breath got caught in her throat.

Who was this girl of this incredible beauty? She looked almost angel alike, her hazel eyes piercing with determination, yet gentleness and long, wavy, blonde hair cascading down her thin shoulders.

„Yeah… sure" Santana's words came out more in a squeak than the expected casuality.

„Thanks" the girl calked, pondering her following words. „I'm Quinn" she said sticking her hand out in firm, yet cute way.

Santana arched her eyebrow, staring at the girl with hesitation, before she reached her hand out too and wrapped it around Quinn's.

The skin of the girl tingled on Santana's and she had to pull her hand away before she would make any embarrassing noises.

Partly Santana wondered, why a girl as beautiful and as gracious as Quinn prefered her company over the popular kids'. The blonde was easily the most beautiful girl in this room and still here she was, sitting next to the "newbie".

"I heard you're new here" The girl's eyes stayed glued on her meal, which she tentative moved up and down the plate.

"You know you don't have to eat that, right?" She chuckled, noticing the girl's distaste.

Hesitantly, the blonde looked up, meeting the latina's curious gaze.

"I know, but... I'm hungry" she blushed.  
Why was admitting she was being hungry such a big deal to the skinny girl? Personally, Santana used the word hungry every second sentence.

"Well, I can understand, however I don't understand how you can eat chicken-shit like that" Cracking a joke, eases the mood, her mom said. (since she held a speech about how Santana'll make friends in no time)

"I don't know either, I guess it's just the circumstances making me eat nearly anything lately" Quinn half sighed, half smiled.

"What circumstances?" Santana was puzzled by the girl's choice of words. What did she imply? Did she have some sort of disease?

Quinn frowned, quickly glimpsing underneath the table, as if some sort of mystery was hidden underneath it. The blonde pinched her nose, her eyebrows furrowed and her expression blank.

"Nevermind" she shot Santana a sweet smile, which didn't quite reach her eyes.

"So, where do you come from?" Quinn changed the topic smoothly.

"Huh? What?" Santana asked, her mind still dwelling on Quinn's implications.

"You know... where your home was before you moved"

"Oh, I come from New York" Santana eventually caught on. She didn't know whether Quinn's slip up or her seemingly disinterest in a conversation was more awkward.

"New York?" Quinn's eyes nearly bulged out, as she rolled the _r._ In some weird twisted way, Santana was turned on by the girl's low-pitched voice.

"I always wanted to go there" It didn't take genius to tell half of Lima never has been to New York and probably never will, because of financial reasons.

If they were lucky they could pay for an extended vacation in Illinois on a farm.

The word "Lima Loser" made its way around the school and apparently inhabitants were not proud of their own town.

Sure, Santana was annoyed by the constant clamour in New York City as well, but it was not like she despised it or her biggest dream was to get out.

"Who knows? Maybe I could tag you along when I visit my dad's" Santana didn't know if it was the right thing to suggest, but with Quinn things moved faster than usual.

"You barely know me, Santana. Why'd you do that?" The blonde inquired warily. Seems like she could cross "Nice Strangers" of her list "Perks of Lima", too.

"I like you, Q" It took a lot of courage to choke out those words. She was not used to being nice and gentle (or forward with people she adored).

"Uh, thanks. I guess I like you too. But don't you thing this is taking thing a bit too far?" Quinn raised her eyebrow coyly.

"Nah, my mom told me to make friends today and I guess I did" Santana concluded.

"Your mom tells you what to do?" Quinn grinned sheepishly.

_Oh god._

"Yeah, but shush, this is our little secret" The tan-skinned girl said cockily.

"I'm good at keeping secrets" Quinn pretended to seal her lips and throw away the key.

"You better be, blondie, cause I'm not going to ruin my reputation" Santana threatened jokingly.

"Or what? You'd cuddle me to death?" Quinn giggled and Santana could swear it was the most adorable thing she's ever seen.

"I'm way more badass than this" The brunette scowled, trying to look dangerous.

"You look like a chicken" The fair-haired girl screeched, her eyes watering with tears of laughter.

"Am not"

"Imma call you chicken-shit, from now on" Quinn proposed daringly.

"You wouldn't!" Santana tore her mouth open in faked shock.

"Anyways, I have AP History now and this teacher always wants us punctual" Quinn sighed, gathering her stuff slowly.

"Aw, I guess I'll see you later?" Santana pouted. Fucking Santana Lopez pouted. This was among the highest rarities in her life.

"I don't know, maybe tomorrow" Quinn glanced behind her back, towards the big wooden clock hanging across the cafeteria.

"Even worse" Santana protested.

"Bye, chicken shit" Quinn used the table as a support to pull her body up.

Once Quinn was fully stood and Santana's eyes attached to a certain buldge on Quinn's stomach.

_No, no, no no. _

Underneath the thick coats of Quinn's clothes, a small, yet visible baby bump was present.

Santana couldn't come up with any proper words to say to the girl.

_How come I didn't notice it? Damn, that's what she meant with circumstances._

Santana's eyes followed Quinn, as she slowly made her way towards the exit.

The brunette didn't quite comprehend what just happened as she hurried out off the cafeteria, her face turned pale.

_Continuation follows! This will be a multi-chapter fic, so don't worry. Also, tell me what you liked about the story and what I should improve. And yeah I know the ending is kinda strange, but it's the basis of my fic.  
_


	2. can't seem to forget

"Move your butt an inch, girl" Mercedes pushed the blonde slightly sideways, creating enough space to sit down next to her.

"Hello you too" Quinn shortly glanced up from her book, acknowledging her friend's presence.  
"Spare your politeness, blondie" The diva propped her elbow on the table, using her hand to support her chin.  
"Whatever"

Mercedes ignored Quinn's „I'm too busy reading a book" gesture.  
"So… How are you?"

"I'm really not in the mood to talk, Cedes" The blonde sighed, playing with the cover of her book.

"Whenever you're in the library, you're so unlike yourself. I never see you quieter than here"

A small chuckle escaped the blonde's lips as she flipped the page and went on reading.

"You're ignoring me, I see" Mercedes playfully rolled her eyes, which the blonde didn't notice.

"I hear you've talked to the new girl" she tried to engage her in a conversation.

Quinn's eyes tore away from the pages and focused on her friend sitting next to her.  
"Yeah…" she tried. How did Mercedes know they talked? Did she like stalk them?

"How do you know?"

"Jewfro's blog, duh. Apparently it's a scandal such a hot girl is hanging out with the fallen Queen Bee" Mercedes stirred up the gossip.

"She just needed some place to sit, and by accident I had plenty of space next to me" Quinn couldn't shake the fast beating of her heart remembering the earlier events.

The latina has been on her mind the entire day. Wherever she went, or whatever she did, she couldn't stop thinking about the conversation they had and the girl's memorizing eyes.

"Don't fool me, Fabray. She sat next to you because she _wanted_ to."

The feisty girl caught the blonde's attention. She was right. Santana could have taken any other seat after all. Boys were basically drooling after her when she entered the dinning hall, Quinn knew those looks and could assure they were only too willing to make place for a beautiful girl next to them.

"Perhaps she is not like them" Quinn guessed. She couldn't find any other explanation why Santana would choose her over someone else.

"She may be different, you know? Believe it or not, they're some people who are not superficial" The girl tapped her chin in doubt.

"If there is, I never met such a person" Mercedes thought out loud, referring to the bashful comments and glares she received just because she was not as skinny as average girls. To her size didn't matter, to others it obviously did. Even Quinn cared too much about appearance.

"She could be a weirdo who's into those dwarf and shooting games"  
Quinn rolled her eyes at Mercedes' suggestion. She didn't picture Santana as that type of person.

"Whatever the reason is, once she finds out my reputation is toxic, she will run faster than her thin legs can carry her" Quinn concluded, a pang of sadness visible on her face.  
She hasn't known that girl for long, however she knew she might never get her out off her mind.

Meanwhile Mercedes sighed in annoyance. Quinn would never stop feeling insecure.

"First, stay positive. Your negativity is giving me headache. And second, your legs are as thin as hers and did you run from me? No. That may be down to the fact, that you gained a few pounds the last weeks and your reputation got worse than the acting of the Faking It cast, however I believe we still would be friends even if you maintained your popular-head-cheerleader-status."

"I changed. I called you names a year ago. I threw drinks in yours face."

"Don't tell me your whole personality changed because of a few more pounds on your ribs. Deep down you've always been the same person, you were just good at pretending to be someone else"

Quinn softly bit down on her lip. Perhaps she was right. Perhaps she never meant to be a mean bitch who throws insults at random she wasn't a _that_ bad person afterall.

"Even if Santana is like me, who said she would change as well?"

"We just wait and see, okay? Don't worry too much, she's just a stranger"

If only Mercedes knew.

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A week passed faster than she thought and she didn't see the mysterious blonde _once._  
Either she was delusional when she met her or the girl is avoiding her.

Santana spent most of her classes alone, sitting in the corner on her own and pretending to listen to the teacher.

She's been asked out on a date several times but always declined. Maybe it wasn't the time to take over the school yet.

The brunette put the search of the shy girl she met the first day at McKinley behind becoming popular. She knew she would easily take over this school, finding this girl seemed like a tougher mission. Perhaps the girl had different classes or was a year above her.

This Jacob guy wrote an article about her having lunch with "preggers". Santana was not very affected by it. Instead she did quick (okay, long) research on Quinn and found out... nothing.  
All the articles concerning the blonde were deleted or contained minor to unimportant information.

She found the girl's Facebook (which is not creepy at all) but thanks to the privacy setting she could only make out a picture of Quinn in a cheerleader outfit.

It didn't surprise her at all. Besides being pregnant, Quinn seemed like the blonde all American cheerleader type. If it wasn't for her pregnancy, she still might be.

The only thing she did know, is that Noah Puckerman, who tried to get her number twice, knocked her up and is not exactly supportive.  
If he was, he'd spend his money on his baby's mother not taco bells.

"Mrs. Lopez, would you like to add anything to what I've just said?" the teacher tore her out off her thoughts.

Santana looked up from her desk, meeting the gazes of many curious students. They just didn't get it. She was hot, snarky and pretty, yet she hasn't tried to socialize yet. For people like them who lived off status was this not comprehensible.

"I... uh... No, I don't" Santana stuttered, however quickly regained her confidence.

"Mrs. Lopez, I understand being new is stressful but this is no excuse for not paying attention in my class" the teacher said pointedly.

Although the insults lied on her tongue, she kept her mouth shut and nodded understandingly.

This wasn't the time to reveal her inner bitch.

Just when the teacher was about to open her mouth for a reply, the bell rung and Santana jumped out off her chair gratefully.  
Ignoring the teacher, she grabbed her notebooks and hurried out off the classroom.

She stopped in front of her locker, her breath heaving from the fast walking. The absence of cheerleading in her life took its toll on her already.

The brunette reached out to open the lock, when a faint, yet familiar voice interrupted her.  
"Hi"

Santana stood stiff for a second, before eventually turning around and facing the blonde girl.  
She's thought of this moment for weeks, yet she didn't know how to react.

"Hi..." she drawled out, her eyes locked with Quinn's.

A small smile grazed the girl's lips. Maybe she was as happy about seeing her, as Santana was. Her heart leaped at the thought.

"I haven't seen you around lately..." Santana rambled. Never in her life she's been as embarrassed as in this moment. What if she thought she was desperate for being with her?_OMG_

Quinn quickly caught on, not having noticed the blush forming on Santana's cheeks.  
"Yeah, I was sick"

"Oh. Are you okay now?"

"Just morning sickness. They call it _morning_ sickness, although you have it 24/7. Anyways, I thought I'd rather stay home before I barf in school" This time it was Quinn's turn to blush.

Santana smiled reassuringly. She didn't want the girl to feel uncomfortable around her.

"I guess"

"How have your first days been?" the blonde drawled out.

"Fine, this school... is just very strange in certain aspects"

"Like?" Quinn arched her eyebrow. _God how can raising an eyebrow be so hot?_

"People tend to be... intolerant."

The blonde nodded understandingly, her thumb gracing over her faint belly.

"I know"

Santana threw an emphatic glance at Quinn. She considered hugging the blonde but decided against it.

"Are you busy?" Quinn inquired spontaneously.

"No, I have lunch break. Why?" Santana leaned against her locker.

Quinn hesitated and took Santana's hand carefully, pulling her along.

"I think I should show you something"

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_I'm finally back with the second chapter. It's kind of a filler, don't worry though, the exciting stuff is coming soon. I decided I won't make this too AU-ish, so Puck's the baby's daddy and Mercedes is her best friend. The Finn-Rachel-Quinn love triangle happened as well, although it won't be important for the plot. The only thing that changes is Santana and Brittany. ( I don't know what to do about her yet, perhaps I will leave her out for good).  
Anyways, dont hesitate to honestly tell me what you think of this story! I'd rather be criticized than making this fic unreadable. _


	3. irresistible

Quinn leaned herself against the big metal door and held it open just enough to squeeze her lean body through the space.

"Come on" Quinn whispered, still holding the door open for the other girl.

Hesitantly Santana took a step forward and followed Quinn suit.

Once she's entered the room as well, Quinn shut the door quietly and turned to Santana, curiously waiting for the girls reaction.

"It's… an Auditorium" Santana said when her eyes adjusted to the dim light.

"Yeah, I thought I would show you. I always spend lunchtime here or when I need time to myself" Quinn looked down at the top of her shoes and smiled insecurely.

She's never told this anyone before. What if Santana was going to laugh at her?

Instead of making fun out of her, Santana nodded understandingly, like she knew how it feels to be in Quinn's skin.

"I can relate. Why the auditorium though? What about your room or a park?" The brunette inquired.

"I have no room" Quinn sat down on the stage, her hands clasping in her lap. „My parents… they kicked me out"

Santana looked down at Quinn, her face a tie between horror and empathy.

"Because of the pregnancy?" Slowly she helped herself down and sat next to Quinn. The floor was cold against her legs.

"Yeah"

Santana settled for a moment of silence to let it sink in what Quinn just had told her, before she bumped the other girl's knee.

"They're dumb, you know? They should appreciate a daughter like you"

Quinn smiled shyly. God the girl was gorgeous when she smiled.

"Thanks, nevertheless I was not a perfect daughter"

Santana's mind began racing, desperately searching for a part of Quinn that wasn't flawless. She didn't come up with anything.

"How?"

"I knew how much their belief meant to them and yet I had sex and betrayed them. They kicked me out… because sex before marriage is a sin. Which means I committed a sin" Quinn frowned, replaying the memories in her mind. It hurt talking about it. The last person she has talked about this with was Mercedes.

She trusted Mercedes, Santana was a stranger, yet she weirdly trusted her as well. She took her to her secret hiding place afterall.

"Well… They're stuck up douchebags. Putting your beliefs over the health of your daughter should be a sin as well. And come on, Q, let's be real, three-quarter of this school had sex before and their parents didn't kick them out. The fault is on them, not on you"

Her frown was wavering, being replaced by a small smile.

"Did you just call me Q?"

"Yup, I did" Santana dangled her legs.

"Why?"

"Because it suits you"

Santana slid closer towards Quinn.

"You seem cold" she softly touched the blonde's arm, feeling the goosebumps.

"We could share my jacket" The latina offered.

"I… That's not necessary" The former cheerleader stuttered, the closeness to the other girl driving her thoughts crazy.

"It is. I won't let anyone around me freeze to death" She slowly undid the buttons of her jacket and wrapped it over Quinn and her shoulders.

"Be glad I chose to wear a big jacket today" Santana winked playfully.

Quinn quickly averted her gaze and looked down, her cheeks turning crimson.

"Can… Can I ask you something" Quinn wondered, breaking the spell.

"Yeah sure" Santana nervously bit down on her lip. She was never good at being honest but somehow she felt safe around the blonde.

"Why are you spending time with me?" She drawled out.

"Why not?" Santana shrugged her shoulders carelessly, however her heart was beating faster than at usual speed. Was Quinn creeped out by her? Did she want her to leave?

"Seriously, why?" she inquired sternly.

"I like you, I guess" Santana said, her fingers digging in the fabric of her jeans.

"But… why me? Anyone here would like to spend time with you"

Santana paused, pondering her words. „You're special" She bit her tongue. Hard.

"You would be better off without me. You could be popular" Quinn sneered bitterly. She was afraid of losing Santana to the crowd. The crowd always stole her people.

"Hey, look at me" Santana took Quinn's chin in her hands and turned her face towards her. „It doesn't what others think of you, only what you think of yourself"

Quinn's eyes flickered down to Santana's lips, briefly lingering there.

"I like you and that's it. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of us spending time together" Santana leaned slightly further forward,their noses touching.

She felt Quinn's hot breath against her lips .

A warm shudder ran down her spine and never in her life she felt a greater urge to kiss someone like now. For a moment she thought she would do it.

Their lips were only inches apart.

Instead of giving into the hesitation though, she pulled back panting.

Before she could say something to break the silence, Quinn slid the jacket off her shoulders, let it sink to the floor and hurriedly stood up.

"I… I gotta go."

With swift steps she rushed down the aisle, pulled the door open and disappeared behind it.

Santana was left speechless. What had just happened?

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In class Santana spent her time thinking about the almost kiss.

Why did she want to kiss Quinn?

Why did she pull back?

Why was it the first time she ever felt such a great urge to kiss someone?

What consequences would her action have?

Would Quinn avoid her?

All those questions distracted her mind from paying attention to class. Figuring her life out was more important than repeating US history the tenth time.

When class ended she made up a decision, she would approach Quinn and talk about it. There was no point denying it had happened.

She saw the familiar blonde standing next to the lockers, her face hid behind the locker door.

"I'm not a lesbian" Santana approached the blonde, protectively wrapping her arms around her torso.

Quinn sighed and turned towards Santana.

"I know"

"So you're like pretending this earlier didn't happen?" she sneered.

"Sometimes forgetting is easier" Quinn's gaze avoided hers. Was she afraid she'd kiss her again?

"It's definitely not! You're just lying to yourself" Santana's heart felt like it had just been stabbed a billion times. Her nostrils flared and her gaze hardened. Just like in old days she covered pain with rage.

"Ok" Quinn nodded. Perhaps she understood it was a sensitive topic to Santana. „Let's talk about it"

"Why…" she paused. „Why did you try to kiss me?"

Santana stroke her hands over her jeans insecurely. „I don't know. Maybe I was just caught off guard"

Quinn shook her head disapprovingly. „A kiss always happens for a reason"

"You seem to have experience" Santana concluded.

"I kissed because of populartiy. I did it to stay on top" Quinn admitted.

"You mean Puck?" Santana chuckled for the first time since their kiss. Quinn missed her sarcastic chuckles.

"God, no, I was talking about Finn"

"Finn as in Finn Hudson? The Quarterback who's about same height as the Eiffel tower?" Never in her mind Santana could picture Quinn with him. He was not her league. To be specific, none in this town was Quinn Fabray's league.

"Yeah, him" Quinn smiled back.

"Wow, what a catch. I can't believe you ever let him go" The brunette laughed sarcastically. Quinn joined in.

"Maybe… maybe we can try to figure out what the kiss meant, together" Santana finally found the guts to propose this suggestion.

Quinn over thought her answer. „How?"

"Just continue normally and see what happens? We don't have to rush anything, let's take our time" In her brain the plan sounded a lot better.

"Okay. I don't want either one of us to get hurt"

"Me neither, believe me. I would never let anyone hurt you, Q" Santana extended her arm and offered her hand.

"Let's ditch and go to breadstix together? Heard they have delicious breadsticks"

Quinn slid her hand in Santana's.

"And bacon"

_That was a fast update, wasn't it? I know Santana's quite unlike herself, but keep in mind this story is AU and in another world Santana's behaviour might be different. Anyways, I haven't decided yet whether I should bring in Brittany since I received mixed reviews. I'm asking one last time, do you want her in this story? I'm seriously going to start writing a Pro and Con list._  
_If you find any errors, you can keep them. Tell me what you think (like always). And I already have an idea where this story is going! _


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